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in Health &middot September 8, 2016

Traveling with an Invisible Disability: How To Deal with Rude People

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As I’ve talked about briefly on social media and my trip recap last week, I had some serious issues with employees of the airline and the airport. It boiled down to the fact that I have an invisible disability – emphasis on invisible. The people who I interacted with made it very clear that they didn’t believe there was anything wrong with me and that they thought I was trying to get special privileges like wheelchair delivery around the airport and boarding first. This isn’t the first time that this has happened, although it is the first time that it has been to this extent. Since I’ve dealt with issues like this several times over the course of my life, I feel like I know how to respond, and I want to use these experiences to help people who don’t know what to do if this happens to them.

Traveling with an Invisible Disability: How To Deal with Rude People

Airport or train station employee – Issues like these often involve for the person who calls for a wheelchair, or someone who works for one of the restaurants or stores within the airport. Most likely, an issue you run into will be from the company (airline, train, bus, etc.) themselves. Most likely, if you are in a position to ask for another employee to assist you, do so. If you run into an issue, try to find out who works on the ADA (Americans with Disabilities) compliance and accessibility issues. You can reach out to them and explain what happened and how you would prefer it to go differently. Most likely, they won’t be able to do anything retroactively to help, but just making them aware of what happened will hopefully prevent something similar to happen to someone else in the future.

Airline or bus or train company employee – These are more likely to be prevalent because – at least for flying – the airline employees are the ones that you will deal with most often. For example, when I flew last, I talked to airline employees when I first walked it, when I checked in, when my wheelchair was pushed, when I boarded the plane, on the plane, when I left the plane, and when my wheelchair was pushed to baggage claim. And that’s without counting my layover. So there are many more possibilities that you will directly encounter issues with airline employees than the airport itself.

There are a couple of different things you can do when you have an issue with their employees. 1) Directly ask to talk to or work with another employee. If you, like me, had an issue with the person who pushed your wheelchair, ask for someone else to. 2) File a complaint with the airline/train company/bus company. This gives formal evidence that something happened. Often, these issues come from the fact that these people don’t understand the prevalence of invisible illnesses, so I make a point to explain that. Hopefully this means that eventually there will be training on invisible illnesses and people will understand better.

Traveling with an Invisible Disability: What To Do if an Airline Employee is Rude About Your Disability

Other travelers – This is a little trickier, but also a little better. First of all, you can’t file a complaint against a normal person who is rude. But on the other hand, you can just ignore them. If someone does more than give me a rude look – like says something about they wish that they got special privileges – then I’ll give them the lowdown (with plenty of sass if at all possible, and it is usually possible). I’ll say something like, “Actually, I wish that I didn’t get special privileges because I have an incurable autoimmune disease that is trying to destroy my body, but to each their own!” At the end of the day, though, you can fix them with a look that says, “You’re a rude idiot and I’m glad that you’re not in my life,” and then you can move on. And you can always ignore them, too, but I prefer to make it very clear that they have no idea what they’re talking about, and sometimes I’m not in the mood to be polite about it. ANYWAY. Moving on …

At the end of the day, when it comes down to companies (airline, train station, etc.), they can’t do anything to prevent issues going forward unless they know what happened. Be as specific as possible when you contact them. A potential email might look like, “On [date], I was traveling from [location] to [location] and after I checked in, the person who was called to push my wheelchair told me that I didn’t need a wheelchair. This was hurtful because I have [condition] and while I look fine, I am unable to walk longer distances. Wheelchairs are essential for people like me, whether or not they look disabled or handicapped. In the end I was not denied a wheelchair, but it shouldn’t have been an argument. It was also extremely insulting and unprofessional.”

I hope this helps you, and I also hope that you never run into any issues like I did in the future. If you have, what are your tips for handling a situation like this?

Kate Mitchell

Kate Mitchell is a blogger, chronic illness patient, and advocate who helps people understand chronic illness and helps chronic illness patients live their best lives.

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Comments

  1. Ashley Angle says

    September 8, 2016 at 10:57 am

    This makes me so sad. People are so judgemental. I’m really glad you wrote a post about this because not only is it helpful for people who have an invisible disease, but also those who don’t who need more help understanding.
    Ashley // A Cute Angle // acutelifestyle.blogpsot.com

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  2. Emily of Em Busy Living says

    September 9, 2016 at 7:08 am

    Gosh, I’m sorry this happens to you. Why does anyone care if someone else is passing them in a wheelchair, you know? Is it making their day that much worse that someone is getting pushed instead of walking? Why do people care so much about things that don’t affect them? And seriously, why make a nasty comment about it?

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  3. Alicia says

    September 15, 2016 at 2:45 pm

    I have not experienced any trouble with airline employees,but have experienced attitude and judement other places because of my invisible illness. I love your wording of what you said to someone who judged you. Go you! I have done much the same!

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  1. Things To Do in Ireland for First-Time Visitors | Kate the (Almost) Great says:
    January 11, 2024 at 7:14 am

    […] Traveling with an Invisibility Disability: How To Deal with Rude People, Where To Go in London, HealtheVoices 2019, Fun Things To Do in Boston: A 3-Day Guide […]

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  2. College Tips for Disabled Students | Kate the (Almost) Great says:
    February 15, 2024 at 3:17 pm

    […] Traveling with an Invisible Disability: How To Deal with Rude People, Dating with a Chronic Illness, How To Succeed as a Spoonie Student, How To Succeed in College: Getting Set for a Great Semester […]

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I personally have rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalg I personally have rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, and Sjögren's syndrome, which makes 3 forms of arthritis.⁣
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I’m Kate, a chronic illness patient and advocate sharing what my life is like with 10+ chronic illnesses. Follow me for more and check out my blog at katethealmostgreat.com⁣⁣.⁣
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SHARING YOUR HEALTH EXPERIENCES PUBLICLY⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ I sh SHARING YOUR HEALTH EXPERIENCES PUBLICLY⁣⁣⁣
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I share my personal health experiences online, which I find it somewhat easy to do because I've been talking publicly - albeit to a smaller audience - since my health problems started in 2001. ⁣⁣⁣
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If you share something online, you need to be prepared for people to ask questions or argue with you. Should they? No. Will that stop them? Also do. ⁣
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For example, I generally only talk publicly about a health situation once it has passed, especially if it's an emergency. I also make sure that I'm in a good place mentally before I talk about it. That way, I don't share things I'll regret sharing publicly later. It also helps me be less anxious about sharing these details.⁣⁣⁣
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And I don't share everything! There's lot of stuff that I haven't talked about not only online but with people in real life. It might seem like I share everything I've experienced, but I don't. ⁣
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Week 18 of 2026 Weekly 1️⃣ Cross-stitch and IVIG Week 18 of 2026 Weekly 

1️⃣ Cross-stitch and IVIG 
2️⃣ Another trip to the foot doctor. We’re officially in Try To Avoid My 6th Foot Surgery mode 🤞🏻 
3️⃣ At least there were lilacs?

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This is a series where I answer questions I frequently get about my rheumatoid arthritis. I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice - just saying the truth about my body in particular. 

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May is Arthritis Awareness Month, which is the per May is Arthritis Awareness Month, which is the perfect time to remind people of these facts. Here's today's fact.⁣
⁣
Like, comment, and share to spread awareness 💖⁣
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I’m Kate, a chronic illness patient and advocate sharing what my life is like with 10+ chronic illnesses. Follow me for more and check out my blog at katethealmostgreat.com⁣⁣.⁣
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Week 17 of 2026 Weekly 1️⃣ Making some real progr Week 17 of 2026 Weekly

1️⃣ Making some real progress with this cross stitch
2️⃣ Walking casts have multiple uses, including holding down your mat! (Don’t worry - I only did broken-foot-compatible things) 

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Week 16 of 2026 This week had EVERYTHING 1️⃣ Cr Week 16 of 2026 

This week had EVERYTHING

1️⃣ Cross-stitch during virtual mass 
2️⃣ Tuesday featured a 90-minute meeting during work and then an hour advocacy work call after my day job (both were good!)
3️⃣ Wednesday started at my foot doctor’s office and I left in a walking boot. Hopefully these 3 fractured bones will heal correctly this time 🤞🏻
4️⃣ Thursday started back at MGH for my annual neurology appointment + foot CT scan
5️⃣ Then I went up to Maine … 
6️⃣ to celebrate my grandma’s 85th birthday! 

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I’m Kate, a chronic illness patient and advocate sharing what my life is like with 10+ chronic illnesses. Follow me for more and check out my blog at katethealmostgreat.com⁣⁣.

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4️⃣ Kate takes a selfie in a car.
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